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"One technique does not fit all! " This goes for any first sexual experience, whatever body parts are—or aren't—involved.

"There is gray area here and a lot of debate is still in flux around these issues.

It's important to understand that lesbian sex doesn't necessarily happen between two cisgender women who identify as lesbians.

"I feel that most lesbian sex has been marketed and consumed through the lens of the male gaze, which ends up looking like two women [when a woman rubs her vulva against another woman's body for sexual stimulation]," Sells says.

"Be sure to ask for consent before you touch, lick, stick, spit, bite, or suck on anything," Sells says.

First of all, penetration is not required for sex to be "real," whatever that means.

Sells adds that gender and sexuality exist on a spectrum, and what is most important is the intention behind the sexual connection, not the gender or sex you were assigned at birth.

What are some tips for having lesbian sex? "All of this and more is 'lesbian' sex," certified sex coach, sexologist, and sex and intimacy expert tells Health.

This is when you spend time exploring the "pleasure spots" of both your bodies to find out where—and how—you like to be touched.

Yes, some people enjoy this, but others don't get any pleasure from it.